Secret Ingredient

My wife and I had decided to get a divorce. About a month before we submitted the paperwork, I found a key in her purse to a lock box that had "keep out" written all over it. Inside, I found a journal describing an affair she had been having for a year with a guy I knew (he was also married) and a bottle of lotion. What irritated me first is that he had more sex with my wife in the last year than I had had in the last TEN years. Secondly, this was the same woman who had accused me of fooling around on her during our whole marriage (which I hadn't). Let me also say that she was the most financially irresponsible person I had ever met in my life and I was looking forward to getting rid of her; however, it still hurt when I found out the truth. What I did next was cruel, but I've never regretted it. I mixed a very small amount of battery acid in with the lotion. About a week later, I read an entry in her journal that they had to stop having sex for a while because they were both "raw" for some unknown reason. I still laugh about it today when I think about it. And just in case you're wondering, she didn't hook up with him after our divorce. He refused to leave his wife and she moved to another state.

— Ben, 30