Blind Date Story

I met this woman on the internet. She was local. Being recently divorced, I was eager to move on to a new relationship. We chatted for several weeks online before we exchanged phone numbers. No pictures were exchanged. We talked on the phone, and she seemed pleasant enough. Well, she asked me out on a date. It was no big deal except that, before I hung up, she quickly told me she was going to seduce me! Talk about pressure! Well, I showed up at her apartment, and her daughter's boyfriend let me in. She was in her room getting ready. She yelled out that she had spent all afternoon in the bathroom preparing herself. I was nervous. I walked around her living room until I came across a picture of her daughter. It was not a good sign to me because the daughter was not that nice looking. I was nervously sitting in a chair near the entrance. Well, she finally walked out of her bedroom, and I saw her for the first time. Yikes, she was ugly! She said she forgot something and ran back into her bedroom. I bolted out of her apartment and ran to the car. I drove off as fast as I could. Caddish, yes, but did I feel bad about it? I don't think so. That was the last blind date I ever went on, ever, and I won't do that again.

— Carson, 30