Surviving the Stickiest Sex Snafus

Having a sex life - even a relatively happy one - is fraught with hazards. Here, we share with you our survival guide for managing the stickiest of snafus.

Passion Problem #1: And You Are?

You wake up - and don't remember your bed buddy's name. This one's easier than you think, provided you don't panic. If you're at his or her place, scan the bathroom cabinets for prescriptions, the magazines for addresses, the trash for junk mail. (Just make sure you've got his or her name and not a roommate's.) If you're at your place, you'll have to employ a little casual inquiry. Ask if he or she has any nicknames, or how they got their name. Still no luck? Ask to exchange business cards, or get contact info (and pray they think to write their name down, too).

Passion Problem #2: Caught in the Act

Play it simple and apologetic. If you're surprised by your parents while staying at their house, simply say you're sorry and then do what you both really want to do - pretend the whole thing never happened. If you're, say, surprised by the local cops while reigniting your love life at the city park, the correct response is to apologize profusely, promise to never do it again, dress quickly, and get the hell out of there.

Passion Problem #3: Fantasy Freak-Out

So, your sweetie didn't have quite the reaction to your fornication fantasy as you'd hoped. Employ a little humor ("Of course I was kidding about that part, honey!") while making sure your sweetie knows that sharing fantasies is just for fun; it doesn't mean you actually need to make them a reality.

Passion Problem #4: Name Calling

If you call out the name of some other lover (whether it's past, present, or totally imagined) in bed, you need to cover your butt. If there's really no meaning for your faux pas (and if there is, you've got some explaining to do), just smile, apologize, and admit that you sometimes even call the dog by your brother's name by accident. You can further prove the point by calling all your friends by the wrong name. Sure, you'll look crazy, but at least you won't look like a cheater.

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Try These Pickup Lines

  • Just like Jerry Maguire, you had me at hello.
  • Hey, babe. Nice tooth.
  • Smile! It's the second best thing to do with your lips.
  • Is your last name maple? I could have sworn you're as smooth as syrup.
  • Are you an angel, or are you just here for sex?