Ashes

How can you just walk past me,
without even a sideways glance?
Once, our hearts marched to the same beat,
we were together, and it was wonderful.
Never once did I touch the ground when I was with you.
Your smile said "forever,"
and I felt safe.
You showed me so much; you changed me.
And I trusted you.
I trusted you because I looked up to you and I wanted you to help me change;
I wanted to be more like you.
I didn't want to love you, really, I didn't.
I fought my heart tooth and nail from falling in love, but my heart won.
"It will not last and you'll end up broken," my mind warned, but I didn't listen.
And now,
I am broken. Broken, just like a porcelain doll dropped to a cold cement floor.
You set my heart on fire with those words, those eyes.
You saved me from falling apart.
But, just as the wick of a burning candle withers to a tiny black stump,
my heart burned to ash in your hands.
And you blew those ashes to the wind as you turned your back and walked from me.
I have never been special, never been beautiful, but with you,
I was.
My imperfections estranged us; my childish inhibitions and steadfast ways;
and now, I have lost you.
I have lost your fervent eyes and loving smile, those kind words and that feeling of safety when you held me in your arms.
Now, I am yet again, nothing more than an insignificant shadow, hiding from the light you emit,
always stealing the chance to glimpse you from afar.
I am just another girl to you, as you grin and walk hand-in-hand with her, and that is how I shall remain;
A cold and emotionless statue who must forever mourn the scattered ashes of what she once guarded so dearly.

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