Search

Q: I am 42, and I started a relationship with a man who is 34 and has two pre-teen kids. He is a Jehovah's Witness, and I am Catholic. His parents are adamant about not meeting me because of my religious beliefs. My boyfriend is very accepting of my age and my religion, and I accept him with his kids and his religion. We have a good relationship, but he is calm and I am very outgoing. I like his calmness, but sometimes I want him to be a little more aggressive. With so many differences between us, should I take it one day at a time or end the relationship?- Maria, 42

Dr. Susan: You haven't mentioned anything that would indicate that either of you is unhappy. "Differences" aren't enough to make a couple give up on a relationship. His so-called "calmness" is precisely what makes him so accepting of your differences. Don't expect him to become more aggressive. Although he's still fairly young, it's a situation of "what you see NOW is what you'll be getting LATER." Most of us would probably like to change our partners just a little, but it makes so much more sense to change ourselves to be more accepting. Why don't you give it a while to see how those differences play out?