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Time to Meet the Family?
Q:
I'm 21 and I've been dating the most wonderful guy for the past three months. We never fight, bicker, or disagree. But there might be a fight coming on. My boyfriend asked me a month ago to go home with him to meet his family and friends. I have no problem with this and I'm actually excited. The problem is, when I asked him to go with me for my family's vacation he totally skirted the subject. It would mean so much to me if he came with me. How do I get him to go without guilt-tripping him? -- Lily
Dr. Susan:
Maybe it's just me, but it seems like meeting your boyfriend's family is one thing, but asking him to spend a whole vacation with your family is another matter. After dating you for only three months, he may be understandably leery of committing to so much family time -- with an unknown family. Of course, both you and I are only guessing at this point. Rather than fearing a fight, take this as a great opportunity to learn how the two of you manage potential disagreement. Forget about "getting him to go," and just ask how he'd feel about meeting your family. Then see if you can compromise on some sort of vacation that allows you plenty of alone time with him and SOME time with your family.
Dr. Pamela Chollet has a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and Master degrees in educational psychology and fine arts. Her passion has been helping people face and get through those times when they feel trapped and unable to move forward.
Read her complete bio!
NOTE: The information contained herein is provided for information purposes, and not intended as a substitute for advice or treatment that may or should be prescribed by your physician or recommended by your therapist.
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