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Q: I have a boyfriend who claims to love me but doesn't care about my problems. For example, when I have a problem, I expect him to follow up with whatever he says he'll do to help me, but he doesn't. When I ask him about it, he tells me he forgot and that I worry too much. Does he really love me? – Joan, 32

Dr. Susan: Love is a complicated set of feelings and decisions. Whether or not your boyfriend truly loves you can't be determined by judging one single behavior on his part. While no one likes to be told they're worrying "too much," it only means that your boyfriend doesn't take your issues seriously. Your problem isn't a problem to him, so why should he bother paying attention to it? Determine whether his ignoring your concerns is a pattern. Consider whether "I forgot" is a sufficient response when you remind him of his promises. He may love you in a certain way, but perhaps not enough to make much effort for you. But, of course, do consider whether you are fretting too much about things that don't really matter.