He Loves His Car

My sister's husband set me up on a blind date with guy he worked with. I spoke to "Johnny" a few times on the phone and he seemed pretty nice. Since they worked on the road, me and sis took a little vacation to see them. Our date started out kind of frantic since he was picking me up at the motel when he was dropping my brother in law off from work. He suggested we run back to his house so he could clean up then go out for dinner. This wasn't too weird so I hop in ready to check out the city. We get to his place and have a couple of drinks when he decides he wants to wash his SUV before we go out. I'm thinking a quick run through a car wash but alas, I was sorely mistaken. He takes me to a bay rental and proceeds to fine wash his car, detailing it out and when I offered to help he said "No, girl. You just stand there and look pretty." Uh, yeah. We get back to his house for the "shower" and he proceeds to install new fog lights on his precious truck. He also almost gets into a fist fight with his neighbor over his stereo and plays remote control cars with a neighbor kid, all the while promising that shower and dinner. After several drinks, I was getting tipsy and had to have something to eat. I told him so and he suggested we run back to my motel and pick up some fresh clothes, come back to his house and get cleaned up then go to dinner. My patience was wearing thin but I said okay. After we left the motel, I noticed he was all over the road and convinced him to stop at a restaurant first. We sat at the bar and struck up a conversation with a guy and his son next to us. "Johnny" passed gas right in front of me and our new friends. He also proceeded to put his hand on my belly and tell me I needed his baby. Considering he had let it slip he had two illegitimate children by two different women, I told him he was crazy. We get back to his house and I practically ran to the shower to lock myself in (of course he wanted to join me.) I showered so long that he finally passed out in front of ESPN. I left him there and locked myself in his room to get some sleep. The next morning my brother in law showed up and I told him that I wanted to leave immediately. Next time (if there ever is one) I will bring a map and plenty of cab fare with me.

— Carla, 28

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