True Colors

Mine is not so much a dating disaster as it is a relationship disaster. I was involved with a man (Police officer) that forgot to tell me he was involved in many other relationships already. I fell head over hills with this man and we appeared to be doing really well. After 9 months of dating, he asked me to marry him. Two days after popping the question, he refused to answer my calls. I was frantic with worry. I finally went to police station and refused to leave until he talked to me and explained his actions. We eventually got back together (he said he "just got scared"), but the trust was gone and I began to see him in a different light. Things didn't add up, so I did some investigating of my own. I put a hidden camera in his room and a recording device on his phone and got a wealth of information. I then confronted him; I asked him a series of questions, but before he answered, I told him I already knew the truth. Of course he denied everything. We straightened everything out and actually grew stronger BUT ... I just could not trust him. I decided I could not spend the rest of my life with him, but still could not let go. We had an engagement party and during it, I decided to show the world his true colors. It was a barbeque party with all his cop friends, mostly men. When the party was winding down, one of the guys asked if he could watch a movie (he had a huge big screen TV). The guys all started saying stuff like; "Got any porno?" I pushed play and a tape of my fiancé was playing with one of his girlfriends. Imagine the look on his face when he entered the house carrying a tray of food. It was classic, I'm sure the words were familiar but he was still confused till he saw the TV and the faces of his co-workers. He kept asking me to turn off the TV but I had thrown the remote in the pool, it took him a few minutes to pull the plug. Everyone was stunned, especially since they were all telling me how highly he respected me and how much in love he was!!! I walked out of there and said, "Have a nice life." That was two years ago and I haven't been able to even go out on a date!

— Kate, 34

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