My New Invention
I just patented a new invention. It's a glove made from the same fabric they use to make pantyhose and stockings. You slip the glove on your hand and pleasure yourself. You will not believe how this thing enhances your pleasure. I plan on going to market with this thing soon. Watch for it on the internet. Once you try this glove, you'll be hooked for life. Keep a pair of these in your car at all times.
— Tadeas, 25