To put it mildly I want my wife's two friends so bad; they both flirt with me. I got drunk last night and sent them text messages telling them what I wanted to do and they both replied. One said, "Oh my God!" She is twenty-two and always calls me when she is drunk. I wouldn't last ten seconds with her! The other is forty-one and chatted with me for forty-five minutes. I think she is game. A few years back when she was drunk around a campfire, she said that we would have a good sex life if we were married. Time will tell. This is bad; when I have sex with my wife, I pretend it's one of them.
— Bob, 41