Affair To Remember

I met a guy when away from home at a training course. We got on well and one evening, went out for a couple of drinks together without inviting or telling any of the other course attendees. I felt an immediate attraction to him and we talked for hours. His hotel room was a few doors down from mine, and upon our return back, we stayed chatting outside my room for about half an hour. I was too nervous to invite him in "for coffee," as the rooms didn't even have a coffee machine and I didn't want to risk the rejection! We went our separate ways that night, not knowing if the attraction was mutual. The next night, he went out for drinks with the other guys on the course. I stayed behind to study, but texted him asking if he wanted to pop round and study with me later. A few flirty texts were exchanged, and he promised to pop by after their drinks. By this time, the attraction seemed quite obvious to both of us. The hours went by and eventually I went to bed, disappointed, at midnight. Then I received a text saying he was just leaving the bar and could he pop by? My heart thought yes, but my head thought no. I ignored the text and disappointed, went to sleep. This was the last night of the course and I needed a clear head for the last day which was an exam. The following morning he texted me to say he was sorry about the night before, but was ready now if I wanted to pop round to see him! I smiled as I now knew he wanted me, but it was too late to do anything about it. Now that we both knew there was an attraction, we kept in touch by text and instant messaging, getting more and more flirty and suggestive. He is married (fourteen years) with four kids and same age as me, but lives over two hundred miles away. I am in a relationship of three years and no kids. Neither of us has gotten any sex from our partners in the last six to twelve months, so we were ready as anything. Two weeks after our first meeting, he had to go on a business trip nearby and organized a hotel in my home town. We arranged to go for dinner that night. He picked me up at my place and we immediately kissed passionately and felt the sexual tension. We then spent the next two and a half hours in his hotel room having some very hot and steamy sex. This guy was well endowed and very good in bed. We ended up in the shower, where we continued the fun until it was almost a shame to have to go out to get some dinner! Later, we had a couple more drinks, and then my partner met with us for a drink. He had been out with friends separately; he obviously had no idea what had happened, which made it feel more exciting. Another two weeks later, we arranged to meet again. This time, I was away on another training course, but only for one night. He came over and we had another fantastic evening in bed; we both knew what each other liked now so had lots of fun. We both knew that this thing couldn't jeopardize our existing relationships, but I was surprised at what came next. We had parted with lots of hugs and kisses, and seemingly no regrets. But two days after our last encounter, he stopped responding to my texts and put himself offline from instant messaging. Now I am torn between feeling rejection, and wanting to contact him even if it's just to say, "I miss you, what happened? How did I screw up? Can't we still be friends?" Then I think, "Stupid woman, why are you trying to chase him?" and "At least he isn't stalking me." I feel so sad, like I loved and lost this guy, even though we both betrayed our real loves.

— Roseanne, 35

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