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Too Late to Act?
 
Q: I have been attracted to this girl at work for over a year know. She had feelings for me before but I didn't react because she is 36, 11 years older than me. Now she seems disheartened by the fact I never did anything, though now I'm ready to show her I'm very serious about her. My question is how would I let her know I'm serious now, or did I already ruin it? -- Mitch, 25

A: Why not simply begin all over again? Ask her out for coffee or suggest something simple to do together outside the office. If she is at all still interested in you, she'll probably take a chance and say yes. I think you would be making a mistake if you tried to tell or show her you're "serious" before you've established a real relationship. It's never too late to try, really, unless she has someone else. Your age difference may or may not be a problem. Meanwhile, just be honest. Tell her that you must have been crazy not to pursue her a year ago when you first knew you were attracted, but now you've wised up and would love to get to know her better.

 
 
Susan K. Perry, Ph.D.,  is a social psychologist and relationship expert. She is a bestselling and award-winning author whose latest book is "Loving in Flow: How the Happiest Couples Get and Stay That Way." She has written for and been quoted in Cosmopolitan, Psychology Today, Family Circle, Women's Health & Fitness, YM, USA Today, The Los Angeles Times, Child, and many others. She also consults and teaches writing online. Read her complete bio!
 
NOTE: The information contained herein is provided for information purposes, and not intended as a substitute for advice or treatment that may or should be prescribed by your physician or recommended by your therapist.
 
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