Often we'll have dates with intense chemistry - and dull dinner conversations. Or a comfortable compatibility, but with a lousy good-night kiss.

We ask He and She: What's more important in new relationships: chemistry or compatibility?

He Says:

Chemistry! Compatibility is something within your control (at least a little). You can work to find common ground, to compromise, to find shared interests and passions - even if that passion is only for each other. And those differences? They might be complementary, making your relationship even stronger. But, really, it's just that compatibility has its limits. It'll only get you so far. But chemistry - that indefinable something - can't be created or faked. And you can't really have a love connection without it.

She Says:

But compatibility can create chemistry. You can't assume that just because you don't have that sizzle of connection at first, you never will. Many great relationships start as friends first. Having a promising - if unpassionate - start, with shared interests, goals, and personalities can be enough to keep you hanging out long enough for love and lust to really build.