By Laura Snyder

If you've just been through a breakup, you know all about the avalanche of advice you'll get from your well-meaning friends. Call him. Don't call him. Avoid her. Make sure it gets back to her how happy you are. Go out. Stay in. Rebound. Take a break from dating.

Want to know what we think?

Go ahead and...throw a pity party.

Hey, you're in pain. No need to pretend otherwise. Cry your eyes out, scream, write terrible love ballads. Reread her old letters. Smell his sweater. Give yourself permission to feel the pain deeply, to drown yourself in beer, ice cream or whatever gets you through it. Indulge that little voice that won't stop dwelling on the breakup until you hear it say, "I don't care." Now you're ready to start really recovering.

Go ahead and...get angry.

Heartache is so much more manageable when you can get pissed about it. He found someone else? The bastard! She's taking a new job hundreds of miles away? That corporate-climbing witch! We're not saying you should be in a slash-the-tires fury here. Just stop playing the victim long enough to get mad at the heartless thug who did this to you. Make voodoo dolls and daydream about elaborate plans to ruin your ex's life. Enjoy the bitter-and-angry phase. Just don't stay there.

Go ahead and...forget about staying friendly.

Forget about the cliché of "let's stay friends" for the time being. You're going to need a little time to detox and get that ex out of your system. A head start? Reset your routine immediately. The sooner you stop sitting around moping during what would've been your weekly date with "American Idol" or your usual Sunday brunch time, the better you'll feel.

Go ahead and...cry on a few shoulders.

Don't go it alone. You'll need someone to call when it's your ex's number you're dying to dial. You need folks to fill your suddenly empty Friday and Saturday nights. You need someone to get you drunk and get you out of your pajamas and back into life, or to help you spend countless hours analyzing what it all means, how unhappy your ex will be without you and how lucky you are to be free.

Go ahead and...rebound wildly.

Think a hot one-nighter will purge your pain? Then go for it. But exercise caution. While it can certainly be fun to exorcise the demons of your last affair with one - or many - new flings, it's not without risk. Think long and hard before doing something you may later regret - like sleeping with a friend or work buddy, having unprotected sex with a stranger or calling up your ex.