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By Zena Alexia

Do you ever spot a couple and wonder how they ended up together? How does a not-so-attractive guy get a date with a very attractive woman? How does a so-so female end up in a relationship with a great-looking guy?

Here's the inside scoop—it's because they aren't basing their dating choices on looks alone. They're considering the whole person.

Most of us want to be in a relationship with someone we're happy to be around. What goes into that feeling of happiness varies for each one of us.

Wanting to Feel Special
A big factor is how our partner treats us. Part of the draw of a less-attractive prospect is that this person isn't likely to treat dates like one fish in a giant pool of possibilities. Drawing you in and then throwing you back isn't in their plans. The plainer person is more likely to appreciate being with you and make you feel special.

Also, a fairly attractive person is often drawn to someone who's not a looker because their date has other attractive traits. That so-so guy might have a great sense of humor that fits well with a girl who loves to laugh. That bland-looking woman might be an excellent water skier and therefore a great match for the guy who hangs out in boats all year round.

Whether you go for intelligence, artistic creativity, athletic ability, addiction to quirky TV shows, homebody tendencies, business sense, social butterfly status, cooking skills, neatness or musical talent, you're not likely to care just about how your partner looks.

If that really is all you care about, then you've got an unattractive feature of your own—shallowness.

Looking for Something Deeper
So if you're ready to dive in deep with a honey who's less of a looker than you are, don't be afraid of being judged by your friends. If they're true pals, they'll want you to be with someone who's good for you and treats you well. And you shouldn't care what they think if your sweetie makes you happy.

Of course, you'll need to be physically attracted to your partner to make a long-term relationship work. But your sweetheart's loving and giving character traits can easily outweigh skin-deep beauty.

When you look beyond the surface, you might find a deeper connection than you've ever had before. Take heart!