Should You Stay or Should You Go? How to read dating and relating road signs
Just like you shouldn't drive a car without knowing how to read traffic signs, you shouldn't get behind the wheel of a relationship without knowing when to stop or how fast to move along.
Liz Kelly, dating coach and author of the book SMART Man Hunting, says there are four main relationship road signs that tell you whether to stay on the great highway of love or get off at the nearest exit.
"While the signs may seem obvious, it is really important to have all of them," she says. "These signs are tied to the core issues that can make or break a long-term relationship."
Green Light: You Keep Connected. Kelly says couples should really check in with each other at least once a day. "Regular check-ins will let you build a supportive relationship," she explains.
Red Flag: You're getting busy signals. "Anyone who says they are too busy to call is just not making you a priority," she says. That excuse went right out the window with the first cell phone and pager.
Green Light: You Cheer Each Other On. "Finding the right mate is all about attitude," says Kelly. "You want a positive cheerleader on your team from the beginning." Your sweetheart doesn't have to pull on the leather jacket just because you're into motorcycles, but it's important for them to support your passions.
Red Flag: You're Playing For Different Teams. Don't waste your time trying to make things work with someone when you have extreme lifestyle differences. You'll face major clashes if you disagree on the big issues.
Green Light: You Can Compromise. You remember Sesame Street, right? Happy couples have a balance of give and take in their relationship. That means no keeping score of who's done what for whom when and how often.
Red Flag: Your Mate has a "Me-First Mind." Selfish people suck. Who need to spend their precious time with someone who doesn't reciprocate their efforts? Not you, honey, that's for sure.
Green Light: You Have the Three C's. That's chemistry, communication and compatibility. "Communication and compatibility can build over time, but the chemistry is the first test for whether to stay in or get out."
Red Flag: No One's Speaking Up. "Get out if there is no communication about your feelings, desires and goals." You won't ever really get to know each other otherwise...and why would you want to share you life with a complete stranger?
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