One Strike & He's Out?
Q: I have been married for 13 years and cheated on my wife one time. She came in and found a lady sleeping beside me, both of us fully clothed. No sex had taken place, but my wife was very upset, which I understand. She has served papers on me, and I can't even see my children. What can I do? I want my wife and family back. Home is where I belong and want to be. -- Scott, 38
Dr. Susan: You may have blown everything with that one major error. Of course, you need a lawyer to help you keep your right to see your kids, as they need you as a father no matter how hurt your wife is. As for that lady in bed with you, at your own home, I can understand why your wife doesn't believe your story! Some wives will eventually forgive an affair, if there is enough love left. First you will have to admit the truth and ask for a bit of time to rebuild her trust in you. That she's already served you with papers doesn't bode well for her willingness to hold off on such a major decision. All you can do is throw yourself on her mercy and plead for a stay of execution. It's going to take a while for her to even begin to move beyond her rage.
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Susan K. Perry, Ph.D.
Susan K. Perry, Ph.D., is a social psychologist, relationship expert, and bestselling and award-winning author. Her books include Loving in Flow: How the Happiest Couples Get and Stay That Way, and Kylie's Heel, a novel for adults.
Pamela G. Chollet, Ph.D.
Dr. Pamela Chollet has a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and Master degrees in educational psychology and fine arts. Her passion has been helping people face and get through those times when they feel trapped and unable to move forward.
Anna Charbonneau, Ph.D.
Anna Charbonneau, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist, stress management expert, and author. If you're feeling overwhelmed, stressed out, or struggling to make changes in your life, Anna can help.