Q: I've been married for about a year now, and things aren't going like I wanted. My relationship has hit the bottom, and my sex life died a long time ago. Lately I've been really craving sex bad, and the only other woman around is my mother-in-law, who we've been staying with for the last two years. She has somewhat of a thing for me but sometimes I can't tell. I want to make a move but I'm so scared. What should I do? -- Andreas, 19
Dr. Susan: Be very scared! I can't believe you would seriously consider messing up your life by messing with your mother-in-law. If your marriage has already hit bottom after a year, and your sex life has already disappeared when you and your wife are still so young, it might make the most sense for you and your wife to split up. Things are not going to get better by themselves, but they can certainly get a whole lot worse if you begin an affair with your wife's mother. It's a big world out there. Make the effort to change your situation, not just dig yourself deeper into the prison you've already put yourself in. Do the honorable thing. First, talk to your wife and find out why she's so uninterested in being intimate with you. I would strongly urge the two of you to get your own place to live, however humble. That might change everyone's feelings.
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Susan K. Perry, Ph.D.
Susan K. Perry, Ph.D., is a social psychologist, relationship expert, and bestselling and award-winning author. Her books include Loving in Flow: How the Happiest Couples Get and Stay That Way, and Kylie's Heel, a novel for adults.
Pamela G. Chollet, Ph.D.
Dr. Pamela Chollet has a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and Master degrees in educational psychology and fine arts. Her passion has been helping people face and get through those times when they feel trapped and unable to move forward.
Anna Charbonneau, Ph.D.
Anna Charbonneau, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist, stress management expert, and author. If you're feeling overwhelmed, stressed out, or struggling to make changes in your life, Anna can help.