Not Ready to Settle

Q: I have been playing the field over the past year. I would like to have kids but not right now, as I'm still developing my career. Most of the women I am dating are nice women, but they are wanting to get married and have kids pretty quickly. When I express some hesitation, they don't want to go any further. How can I answer this question honestly without turning them away? -James, 31

Dr. Anna: If you're at that age when it seems like everyone is trying to settle down for marriage and kids, it can be hard to find likeminded people to date. It's better to be honest up front. If you're not ready to settle down, just make sure your dates know from the start. If a woman turns away when she figures out you're not ready to settle down, probably better to view this as lucky. Do you want to be with someone who is constantly pushing you for something you're not ready for? It might narrow your dating options a bit, but you're probably going to be happier dating people who can accept your current feelings and priorities.

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