When Is a Break a Break-up?
Q: After a rough couple of months, my girlfriend told me she wanted to take a break. It's only been a few days now, but I don't know what I should be doing? Waiting for her? Partying? When's a break a break-up?- Tom, 21
Dr. Susan: Because I'm not clear on what you mean by "a rough couple of months," I can't say for sure what's next. But in a good and growing relationship, rarely does one partner need a full break. I mean, if she said, "How about we give each other a little more alone time," that would mean one thing. Taking a break from seeing you altogether makes me think she wants to end it without coming out and saying so. You really have to ask her directly what she means, and if she'd like you to wait without dating others. Then it will be up to you to decide.
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Susan K. Perry, Ph.D.
Susan K. Perry, Ph.D., is a social psychologist, relationship expert, and bestselling and award-winning author. Her books include Loving in Flow: How the Happiest Couples Get and Stay That Way, and Kylie's Heel, a novel for adults.
Pamela G. Chollet, Ph.D.
Dr. Pamela Chollet has a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and Master degrees in educational psychology and fine arts. Her passion has been helping people face and get through those times when they feel trapped and unable to move forward.
Anna Charbonneau, Ph.D.
Anna Charbonneau, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist, stress management expert, and author. If you're feeling overwhelmed, stressed out, or struggling to make changes in your life, Anna can help.