His Girlfriend's Still Dating Around
Q: A close friend recently gave me some upsetting news: while browsing an online dating site, he came across an active profile of my girlfriend! We've been together for about six weeks and there's been no sign of trouble. Do I confront her or just cut ties? - Jacob, 42
Dr. Susan: I always recommend confronting before bailing, but be ready to cut ties if the answers aren't satisfying. I once dated a guy whose ad continued to stay up for weeks after we began dating. He made one excuse after another, then finally admitted he "liked first-time sexual encounters." Great. At least I then had the truth and only myself to blame for falling for his feeble earlier excuses.
Not everyone automatically assumes that if they're dating, it's going to be exclusive. But if one of you assumes it is, and then finds out the other has different ideas, it's time to insist on the truth.
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Advice for Her
Advice for Him
Susan K. Perry, Ph.D.
Susan K. Perry, Ph.D., is a social psychologist, relationship expert, and bestselling and award-winning author. Her books include Loving in Flow: How the Happiest Couples Get and Stay That Way, and Kylie's Heel, a novel for adults.
Pamela G. Chollet, Ph.D.
Dr. Pamela Chollet has a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and Master degrees in educational psychology and fine arts. Her passion has been helping people face and get through those times when they feel trapped and unable to move forward.
Anna Charbonneau, Ph.D.
Anna Charbonneau, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist, stress management expert, and author. If you're feeling overwhelmed, stressed out, or struggling to make changes in your life, Anna can help.