Shouldn't Dating Be a 2-Way Street?
Q: I'm having a difficult time determining whether the woman I recently started dating is genuinely interested in me, or just looking for an excuse to go out on someone else's dime. We have a good time together and the conversation is easy, but she never checks in with me in between dates so I'm getting the feeling she likes the "idea" of dating more than spending time specifically with me. — Stu, 40
Dr. Susan: Sometimes it's easy to know whether someone likes you as much as you are beginning to like them. When it isn't that easy, you might want to take more direct action. Is your date reserved, or maybe broke? If she's not calling to check in with you between dates, how does she react when you call her? I don't know how many dates you've gone on, but how about changing the routine a bit. For example, plan a picnic. You bring the wine, she brings the food. Or just go out for coffee for a change. Or invite her to your place for a very inexpensive meal. Let her know you'd love to hear from her sometimes. If you feel as though it's time, then it probably IS time, to learn whether she's the reciprocating type.
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Susan K. Perry, Ph.D.
Susan K. Perry, Ph.D., is a social psychologist, relationship expert, and bestselling and award-winning author. Her books include Loving in Flow: How the Happiest Couples Get and Stay That Way, and Kylie's Heel, a novel for adults.
Pamela G. Chollet, Ph.D.
Dr. Pamela Chollet has a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and Master degrees in educational psychology and fine arts. Her passion has been helping people face and get through those times when they feel trapped and unable to move forward.
Anna Charbonneau, Ph.D.
Anna Charbonneau, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist, stress management expert, and author. If you're feeling overwhelmed, stressed out, or struggling to make changes in your life, Anna can help.