Can He Reconnect 60 Years Later?
Q: A long time ago, in high school, I admired her from afar. I joined the Navy right after I graduated and made a career there. I ran into her while home on leave from boot camp right before I left for a two-year tour oversees. We dated a couple of nights. I wrote her two or three times from overseas, but was not sure I had her correct address, as I never got a response. Now years later, when I am 78 and she is 76, we both have lost our spouses through death and live a couple hundred miles apart. Could it be possible to reignite that old spark? Should I attempt to contact her? — Jack, 78
Dr. Susan: Yes, contact her and do it right now. The worst that can happen is she won't respond or will say, "Sorry, not interested." You lose nothing. The best that can happen is you can pick up where you left off all those years ago. Or, at least, you may share a pleasant afternoon going over old times. The father of a friend of mine reconnected with his pre-army high school flame and they subsequently married and have lived together for quite a few happy years now. So I know it can happen. Make the attempt, and good luck.
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Advice for Her
Advice for Him
Susan K. Perry, Ph.D.
Susan K. Perry, Ph.D., is a social psychologist, relationship expert, and bestselling and award-winning author. Her books include Loving in Flow: How the Happiest Couples Get and Stay That Way, and Kylie's Heel, a novel for adults.
Pamela G. Chollet, Ph.D.
Dr. Pamela Chollet has a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and Master degrees in educational psychology and fine arts. Her passion has been helping people face and get through those times when they feel trapped and unable to move forward.
Anna Charbonneau, Ph.D.
Anna Charbonneau, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist, stress management expert, and author. If you're feeling overwhelmed, stressed out, or struggling to make changes in your life, Anna can help.