Why Hasn't She Called?
Q: I've recently become interested in a girl who is a "friend of a friend." Our mutual friend advised me that this girl was also very interested in me. After asking me for my phone number, she never called. After our mutual friend advised me it was because she was too nervous, I called her. I got her answering machine and left a message stating that I wanted to "get together and do something sometime, so call me." It's been 3 days and she still hasn't called. Why didn't she call me? -- Cole, 24
Dr. Susan: When a girl is really nervous about contacting a guy, calling him back takes as much bravery as it would to call him in the first place. You can't go wrong by calling her again and, if you have to, leaving another message. Leave your email, perhaps. Respect her so-called nervousness and make it easy for her. You might possibly leave a more specific message, such as asking if she's free the coming Saturday night, or even Sunday afternoon for a picnic or whatever.
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Susan K. Perry, Ph.D.
Susan K. Perry, Ph.D., is a social psychologist, relationship expert, and bestselling and award-winning author. Her books include Loving in Flow: How the Happiest Couples Get and Stay That Way, and Kylie's Heel, a novel for adults.
Pamela G. Chollet, Ph.D.
Dr. Pamela Chollet has a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and Master degrees in educational psychology and fine arts. Her passion has been helping people face and get through those times when they feel trapped and unable to move forward.
Anna Charbonneau, Ph.D.
Anna Charbonneau, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist, stress management expert, and author. If you're feeling overwhelmed, stressed out, or struggling to make changes in your life, Anna can help.