Q: After I met this wonderful guy three months ago, he moved abroad. We've only been in communication by email since then. He called once, but I missed it. I like him. Our conversations by email are interesting and friendly. Sometimes he emails a lot and then there are no emails for a while. So I email and he responds. Still, general and interesting, but friendly. Should I move on, because I would like to be in a relationship? There is no indication that he is interested except for the emails. -- Candy, 45
Dr. Susan: Emails are easy. Love is hard. And building a true love relationship when one of you lives in another country is pretty near impossible. If you want a real relationship with this fellow, what are the odds? Is he coming back to your area soon? If not, you need to move on yourself. Find someone you can grow into love with, that is, someone you can see, hear, and touch. No need to make a big announcement. Just stop emailing him and see if he does anything. He probably won't.
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Advice for Her
Advice for Him
Susan K. Perry, Ph.D.
Susan K. Perry, Ph.D., is a social psychologist, relationship expert, and bestselling and award-winning author. Her books include Loving in Flow: How the Happiest Couples Get and Stay That Way, and Kylie's Heel, a novel for adults.
Pamela G. Chollet, Ph.D.
Dr. Pamela Chollet has a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and Master degrees in educational psychology and fine arts. Her passion has been helping people face and get through those times when they feel trapped and unable to move forward.
Anna Charbonneau, Ph.D.
Anna Charbonneau, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist, stress management expert, and author. If you're feeling overwhelmed, stressed out, or struggling to make changes in your life, Anna can help.